Monday, 20 October 2008

Specially to my Mum

My mum is not the greatest mum on earth. I say that to her sometimes but I let her know why. But I also assure her that I love her nonetheless. She has her ways of making me and all of us in the house mad, and constantly drives me especially up the walls, although it should be the other round. Our relationship had never been good since schooldays and perhaps, it could be due to the fact that I can´t accept her for who she is. Nor, can she accept me or us for who we are and often enough, volcano erupts often in our house. She has a weird character that even her sibblings and friends could not understand and they shy away from her. Till today, she still have her quirky little habit that makes me, my sis and my dad often questioning its logic.

But a couple of years ago, she suffered from a bad stroke that left her half paralysed. Her character changed soon after, and things were much better around the house. Her character had since mellowed a little due to her energy level, though her bossiness trademark is still there, it was bearable. But I see a different her eversince she had her stroke.

Eversince she suffered from stroke, I realise that I am connecting to her inner child more and more each day. She would be grinning from ear to ear if she gets what she wants and throws tantrum like a kid when she does not. Her mind is much simplified and not as complicated as before and finally, I am beginning to understand her. This was how my mum was few weeks ago.

Now ...

I was informed of my mum´s deteriorating condition a week ago. She had been vomitting since past 2 weeks every morning. Her weight has dropped significantly, and her concentration is getting from bad to worse. I was on the line with her a while ago. She was in the hospital under glucose drip as it had dropped to 2.2 (normal is 5-6). My sis, brother and dad is waiting for a scooping test to be done on her an a few other test to determine what is the cause of her vomitting. But it was not just vomitting that´s causing us concern but some of her vomit had blood traces apparently. Doctor has not ruled out anything yet ...

Blood traces ... do you know what that means? I don´t know and I´m afraid to know ...

My scheduled flight back is supposedly to be on 4th November but I might have to return earlier. All this are pending report from the emergency ward specialist.

And here I am waiting, waiting for good news from my family back home ...

Waiting and waiting, praying and praying ....

All will be well sooon.



I miss her and I wish I can do more for her.


  1. wishing you God's grace this morning, and will be praying for your mum, and the family! take care:)

  2. sorry to hear that, hope your mum will get well soon, we wil also pray for her. take care.

  3. hey lianne im so sorry to hear that..i'll pray for your mum's wellness here..i do hope that everything will be fine..meanwhile take care and be positive :)

  4. Hi,
    I have been a silent reader of your blog for quite sometime. I enjoy reading your blog very much. Today I decided to drop you a line because I was touched (again) by your writing. I wish you and your family the very best and that your mom will be well soon.
    Banana Blossom

  5. Hi Lianne,

    I can understand how you feel at this time. Worry, and want to be at her side, but you are far far away. I went thru this also when my Dad was sick 3 years ago. The only thing you can do now is to call her everyday, and listen to her.

    Hope everything will be better for her. Take care, yourself.


  6. You know, you kinda resembles your mom. Don't worry so much, you'll be seeing her soon. Have a safe flight ya.

  7. So sorry to hear that your mother is not well. Wishing her speedy recovery. I know how you feel being so far away from home and not being there for her. My prayers are with you and your family.

  8. I'm so sorry to hear that....and I will keep your mom in my prayers.
    Don't worry, God will never close all the doors....HE will always open one window:)
    Take good care dear

  9. Lianne, don't worry too much now, come back and spend more time with your mum. I hope aunty will get well soon and am sure she will be so happy to see you again soon.

  10. Be nice to your Mum. You really won't know how much you love her and will miss her terribly when she's gone.

    In a selfish way, this is good for ourselves. It's cathartic.


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